The Lighter Side: Summer food shopping, Shtisel series 3 & Brooklyn’s shidduch!

Not the usual summer supplement content – as there is nothing ‘usual’ about now, including the vocabulary.

Mine has certainly grown in four months as I initially confused ‘Furlough’ (a 17^th century Dutch word –verlof) with ‘furlong’ as in acreage, which probably makes me a covidiot.

But it’s not easy with neologisms being constantly fired such as Covexit (strategy for exiting lockdown), Zoom-bombing (online gatecrashing) and ‘quaranteams’ which you can work out for yourself.

Left ‘unmuted’ grandparents who once linked Apple to honey are now slumped on sofas in front of screens unbeknowingly heckling bar mitzvahs. Trust me it’s hard not to laugh when – “There’s my tatala’ is yelled during the Haftorah.

As the weeks passed and Muntjacs were spotted in Sainsburys, going further than Borehamwood to shop was not allowed. Yes, I’d have preferred Bermuda, but I bet they don’t have a Hadar supermarket with staff offering gloves and masks to customers.

Much like those exciting stores one visits overseas, this Kosher store in Edgware has sweets, snacks soup mixes and cereals not seen elsewhere.

Stocked with over 10,000 well-presented products including fresh fruit and vegetables, Hadar also has Sushi Haven, and as one who could live on raw fish, the seal in me would always select Hadar given a choice.

Another great local discovery was Be Fruitful, which is hidden away in Glengall Road in Edgware. Out walking the dog for some distance, I spotted the fruit, veg and flower selection by chance, but drove back to load up. Fresher than most supermarkets, Be Fruitful sells rainbow tomatoes, mini courgettes,blooming chilli plants and with plans to create a full growing garden centre at the rear, it’s a real find and so ‘cov-enient’.

That might be a neologism too far, but Be Fruitful prompted me to Be Mindful of Covid acronyms as I accidentally messaged WTF when I meant to say I was working from home(WFH).

Put a ring on it.

Had I known Brooklyn Beckham’s engagement, would have been the focus of the simcha pages.

It’s hard to imagine the simcha Brooklyn’s future billionaire father- in-law Nelson Spitz will make after spending £800,000 on his sons’ barmitzvahs.

Should Nelson have any concerns about the shiduch, David has the pedigree as his Jewish grandfather, the late Joseph West took the footballer to shul and Posh and Becks had matching Hebrew tattoos, until she had hers removed. She is still his beloved, but let’s hope Nicole, the bride-to-be feels the same way as Victoria must be banking on designing the vedding gown as the engagement dress was from her summer collection.

For party planning , California-based Mindy Weiss is a contender as she mapped out the nuptials for

Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin, Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi and several Kardashians. As for the cake? Well, Oprah Winfrey’s fav,Israeli master chef Ron Ben-Israel is the master of good taste which is not true of the groom who bought a £250k engagement ring when thousands are losing their jobs.

It did however remind me of the late comic genius Joan Rivers, who in 1984 mocked designer Elizabeth Emanuelle’s ‘small’ engagement ring in an ITV show. “You accepted that and you’re Jewish?” cackled Joan.

“I wouldn’t give that ring to an Arab!.” Joan would not say the same to Nicole, so mazeltov to all.

Mann Meals

I’m no cook and 98 meals a week is dangerously close to full-time employment in a restaurant. Not a problem for Sarah Yeager at Louis Mann & Son Ltd, as this woman not only works at a butchers, she work magic with the meat. Sarah also blogs and shares recipes, so when she announced ‘not much uptake of stewing beef, casserole items and slow cooked dishes’ – who was I to argue.

Mincing has become de rigeur at Louis Mann with Sarah’s tips for tasty koftas and sausages and they’re good. Not content to just deliver to the isolated in London, Louis Mann were delivering to Liverpool, Spain, Ibiza and the Greek Islands and joining a shipment disguised as a schnitzel did cross my mind. Instead I stayed back to make Sarah’s turkey burger with Asian style salad. “It will keep even the most ‘starving’ teenagers full for at least 45 minutes!” wrote Sarah, but you will need to visit www.louismann.co.uk to get the recipe and it won’t stop with one!

 More Mazel tov.

To my dear friend Shtisel producer Dikla Barkai who finally posted news that series 3 is underway with masked proof.

It could not be a day too soon.