She’hechiyahu! Five Jewish things to know about Spurs’ new stadium

A great big She’hechiyahu and Mi She’Berach was heard all throughout N17 this week as Tottenham Hotspur’s long-anticipated return to White Hart Lane – sorry, the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium (subject to naming rights) – takes place, after their Wem-ber-lee exile.

With 62,062 fans to fill the £1 billion stadium for the encounter with South East London strugglers Crystal Palace, let’s take a look at some of “Jewish” features of the new, improved “world famous home of the Spurs”:

1. There’re plenty of food outlets, but apparently there’s no room for the beigel shops. The outlets (which do not include a threatened cheese shop and will not be on something called Deli Alley) do include a fish ‘n’ chips shop, and we did invent the Britain’s favourite filler, didn’t we…?
2. Pints of trendy ale will cost only £2.50. So there’s £2.50 you’ll be saving because Jews don’t drink trendy ale, or any other ale for that matter. Never fear though, you can still get Diet Coke (other brand fizzy drinks are available) or coffee.
3. The home of London’s largest shabbes mincha and maariv minyans has a stand that faces east. But then, all four-sided stadiums have stands that face east – but not all teams are as Spursy as Spurs, so their fans don’t need to pray so much that there’s no last-minute defensive dog’s dinner.
4. It’s still close to Stamford Hill and Clapton, the world famous home of London’s Charedi community. Given that most of the team’s matches are not played on Shabbes, there’s an an opportunity for them to come along and daven for a win with the rest of us. If they can get a ticket, that is.
5. It’s not Arsenal or Chelsea. ‘Nuff said!